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I made surenot to lock the front door. It would be easier when they find me. Andput a yellow post-it note with "Sorry" written on it on my coffeetable. I couldn't bring myself to write an actual letter. I know Iwill disappoint everyone who tried to help me. But I can't be helped.This is what I need to do. Only this will soothe my mind.I took the two sleeping pills. And a few of the others. And then tooka long sip from the gin. And another one. I should feel tired soon.Soon I'll be asleep. Forever. One more sip. Nothing. Yet. I drank moreof the gin until the bottle was left half empty. Still nothing. Weird.I should be at least tipsy. And nothing from the pills. I don't feelanything. Not even nauseous. How's this even possible. Half a bottleof Gin, two strong sleeping pills. My mum took a half every once in awhile and blacked out half an hour later. Why don't I feel anything?It's been an hour now. Were the sleeping pills too old? They can't gothat bad, can they? Should I drink more?. The whole evening turned into a big rush though.First, when I had gotten home from work Jen was talking on the phone while serving supper to the kids. They were supposed to already be at her folks ready to spend the night. She was in clothes she had just thrown on after getting out of the shower obviously in a rush as she still had a towel on her head.She saw me and put her hand on the phone and started issuing orders. "You are going to have to bring them over, I take longer to get ready.". She gave me a quick kiss and started chatting on the phone again, walking upstairs as she did so.Long story short, I had to deal with in-laws and traffic instead of watching Jen get dressed and primped. When I made it home she was ready and I barely had time to get ready myself before dashing out the door, Jen already waiting for me in the car."Hurry up Nick, I told Pat at lunch today that we would definitely be there on time. You need to help them set up the speaker system on the pool deck since.
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